Angry Words: Bad Cream for the Coffee

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“See how great a forest a little fire kindles” (James 3:5)

Don’t we hate it when a good cup of coffee gets ruined by  cream that’s gone bad? Um, excuse me, may I have another cup of coffee please?

It seems that when I most need to write, I resist, unable to unravel the knots of thought about my concerns. There was a time (a much simpler time) when problems sent me straight to pen and paper, writing away my woes and as I wrote, the issue would spin itself out.  Other times, I just read God’s word, prayed, cried a little, and busied my way through it. Over time I have become blessed with three prayer warriors on whom I can call for their petitions to the Father on my behalf, as well as family members’ behalf.  God will know the matter for which they are praying. His word does comfort me, and when I am still and receptive, the Holy Spirit gives me understanding that makes sense of it all. Yet, I know that until I begin to write, the cloud over my head will not completely disperse. You writers know what I mean.

“Angry words, oh let them never, from the tongue unbridled slip. May the heart’s best impulse ever check them ere they soil the lip.” I always liked singing that song in church services. Maybe the soiled lip is the least of the problems. One can ask for forgiveness, bring out the old bar of soap, get a new cup of coffee, and moving on can be done. But it’s the damage done to another’s heart that is the most dreadful result. Then the forest of James 3:5 is torched. Probably, knowing you owned the words that hurt, but didn’t discharge them into the REAL source of your anger, is what makes forgiving self so difficult. I observed one such situation a few years ago, and though I scribbled thoughts for myself then, until I stopped reeling I couldn’t turn it into a lesson to live by or an encouragement for others. However, time heals much, writers block included.

Seeing people we love throw poisonous spears into each other is painful beyond description. Words echo as from a black  malodorous cavern. Words spoken in haste – the kindling that inflames – can be explained believably as “I didn’t really mean it”; but those same words from another are taken straight to heart. It’s a double standard. I truly believe neither side really intended to hurt the other, nor did either really mean all they said. And, unfortunately something may have been simmering below the surface to produce the toxic emesis of words.

People who are passionate about something, like maybe saving the mosquitos in Quebec, or whatever, can get pretty fired up if their ideals are challenged. They can quote all the right research and reasons why this is a deserving mission; and just let someone swat a mosquito in front of them –  you’ll see a sudden explosion, without a glimmer of regret.  There is a way to avoid that scenario. It’s called the golden rule. Just be considerate. Use the mosquito spray when the activists aren’t looking. Just kidding. But not really. My point is, to not provoke someone when it is known that they are wrapped in the issue.

And then to put the shoe on the other foot, the individual who cannot tolerate a missing mosquito, aka a differing opinion, must realize we all have our reasons – and so to respect the difference, especially if on the other’s turf – is also the golden rule. So, if you must kill a mosquito, please do so minimally, outside of our designated area of Quebecian qualified quindecennnial protected species. Or something like that. Anyway, when it comes to conflict a little kindness goes a long way toward one’s own agenda, not to mention protecting relationships, and human relationships are above all, valuable commodities. More valuable, I’d say than any issue most of us would be toting in our over-inflated bag of ego.

Isn’t it strange how one word, or accusation fuels another? Before long no-one is addressing the actual reason for the argument. It gets to be a shameful shouting match, with old resentments brought up (that simmering below the surface I mentioned) and then each injury brings out another insult. As much as we want to forget, some things just won’t scoot out easily. Pride perhaps has more to do with reluctance to ask forgiveness which is harder to do than  forgiving. Even after and if amends are made, that awful echo is there. How do people forget? Short of dementia, it is impossible to pretend the words weren’t out there. And then the hearts of good people struggle with  “did he/she mean it” or “will they be able to forget what I said?” So both sides go away feeling less important than a mosquito, and guilty of causing such feelings. Then satan has had his way. Feeling lowly, guilty, unworthy – those are the playing fields of the devil. He knows that those feelings keep us from approaching the Lord’s throne of grace in the confidence and faith that a child of the King should.

I began to realize that the situation near to my heart was no different from most of the world. But that too hurts – we are not to be like the ‘world’. We are called out, as children of God, to be examples of Christ’s love. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. (Matthew 7:12 paraphrased)

Pray without ceasing (I Thess. 5:17). Ask without doubting. Love without conditions. Forgive as your Father in Heaven has forgiven you. “Be angry and sin not” (Ephesians 4:26).

So all is not lost. We can pour a new cup of coffee; check the cream next time before pouring it; and it only takes two seconds to say “I’m sorry, please forgive me”.

 

Thank God, Even When the ‘Maters are Mashed

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“Oh give thanks to the Lord, for He is good! For His mercy endures forever.” Psalm 107:1

Oh yes! He has given us all we need. Above all, peace (John 14:27); even on a tearful morning when the carnal mind is trying to “mash my ‘maters” with thoughts of earthly things that the world says are important, to cloud over the amazing brilliance of all that God has given. People don’t mean to sit on your tomatoes. They’re just grabbing a seat, living life the same way you want to. Sure, there are things we want in life – in fact, God tells us to pour out our longings to Him – but the level of happiness they bring, rides on an elevator of circumstances. However, the peace, joy and mercy from God aren’t dependent on those things. Physical blessings come and go, but the spiritual blessings are for keeps, unless, of course, we walk into darkness and lose them. Even then they can be restored. “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me away from your presence, and do not take Your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of Your salvation, and uphold me by your generous Spirit.” Psalm 51:10-12

Life is fragile; it comes and goes. But the joy that it brings, and leaves with us, stays. There is a joy in knowing the Giver of that life continues to care, more than we know how to. He sees when we are struggling with gaps in our faith, with holes in our blankets, with pain and quicksands in life.

Sept. 20, 2018. So much life has happened this week. My niece is holding her newborn son today. A dear friend buried her 57-year-old husband yesterday, a sudden loss for the world of lives he touched. Bill however, entered an eternity of peace and joy on Sunday. My baby girl turned 39 today; I don’t feel old, just left behind, sort of. How much of what I meant to do and didn’t is important? We started our farm harvest this week – a reminder of how short seasons really are – and you better start them out right! Lastly, I’ll be attending the wedding of a good friend’s daughter on Saturday. All this in a week! Birth, birthday celebration, wedding, death, and gratitude for a good harvest.

As I sit here by the pond, pondering all this, my husband is running the combine some 50 acres or so north as is a neighbor to my south. Life, work, pleasures and sorrows all go on and on. Sometimes you get the pink one, sometimes the blue.Some days you win, some days you lose. Thank God for each new day woven in peace, for the spiritual joy in the heart He relieves.

Take a journal and start writing; make a list of your blessings. If you compare a list of “what I have” with a list of “what I have not”, you will find the “haves” far exceed the longings. For at the top of the “have” list is God’s son, and you can’t top that!

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Pondering

 

 

PEA PICKIN’ TIMES: There’s a Harvest Among the Tares.

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Among the Goliath weeds and dried corn stalks, roam my pea vines; more rich in vines and scarce in pea pods, I appreciate every last pea I find! Jesus taught in parables that He values every single soul that is still out in the world, not yet gathered into His Father’s house.  In late summer, early fall, there’s a rustle of harvest in the wind that thrills my senses. It’s pea picking’ time.

I always fail to eke out a pea patch from my husband’s crop land, so the pea seed must land in my fertilized garden where they grow rank, as do the weeds that thrive among pathways too grown over for our tiller. At a glance it looks pointless to even wander into the mess, but once within that daunting jungle, I find the hidden rubies that I call cornfield peas. Some years there are purple hull peas, but this year I only planted the heirloom seed from my Daddy, that I plant and save each year.  These also have purple hulls, grow longer than the traditional purple hull, and have a similar taste. From the ground to the top of corn stalks above my head, the pea vines run  over around and through anything in their paths. Along the maze can be found pods of delicious delight for the taking. And there I find each year that even the undesirable have a purpose. The strong stalks of pigweed, much to the horror of you dainty clean gardeners, provide arches as do the cornstalks I plant next to my peas for that very purpose. In my clean pea patches of the past, was the backache of bending to pick peas. Here in the land of traveling towering vines, I just reach out and take in. It’s like making lemonade when you’re given a lemon.

As I picked I was reminded of my first look at Guyana, S.A. where I had the privilege of working with our mission team on several occasions. Unfortunately, the first impression was made while taking in the canals of rotting animals and sewage, along with the odor of a factory’s byproducts. Our taxi ride made me seriously question the reason for being there. However, just one meeting with the delightful thankful Guyanese made it clear. There are jewels to be garnered among the rankest of weeds. I fell in love with the children, as well as the humble adults who welcomed us into their homeland. Never be so shortsighted as to judge the garden by the weeds. Oh, not as pleasant for sure in getting to the goods, but more gratifying at many levels. God didn’t say reaping grain among tares, peas among weeds, nor souls out of the world would be easy. He just said do it.

The first job ever given to mankind (unless you count ‘be fruitful and multiply’) was to dress the garden (Genesis 2:15).  While the difficulty of the job increased after ‘the fall’, the responsibility remained. “Thorns and thistles it shall bring forth for you; and you shall eat the plants of the field (Genesis 3:18). Prepare the soil, plant, fertilize and water, and weed out the undesirable plants until harvest. This will not be done without getting our hands dirty, and rubbing elbows with some real stinkers! Pigweeds, crabgrass, and squash bugs are probably my most detested garden inhabitants. There are indeed problems in the world, some we cannot live with and some we just have to work around. Whatever pigweeds are in your life, just use them to bring God glory with a good harvest.

“Do you not say ‘There are yet four months, then comes the harvest’? Look, I tell you, lift up your eyes, and see that the fields are white for harvest.” John 4:35 ESV

TC, OUR FEARLESS LEADER

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“Oh, well, it’s gonna be all right…” with a shrug of his shoulders, and a dynamite grin; then he would proclaim “God is good, all the time; all the time, God is good!” A word or two with some airport staff member, and in his easy way, our fearless leader made it all right, again. Perhaps if I could just have one more of his hugs this too would be all right. The last time I saw him was at church – was it just two weeks ago? He was at the welcome center and as I came through the front door, he turned, grinned and waved. Why oh why didn’t I go on over to him for that one last shoulder squeeze? I may have thought he would always be here; he had already endured so much! So I hope you will understand as I add one more tribute to our sweet brother in Christ.

I met Tommy’s reputation and heart before I met Tommy. A sure and strong influence on my brother-in-law becoming a Christian, I saw how he and my little sister were loved into fellowship with Christ. Tommy and his “Peg” opened their home too many times to count and taught a fellowship and love for others that will always be remembered. His “Simper Fi” (“young married who aren’t so young anymore but wouldn’t leave their teacher” class) and his fellow mission team members were just some of those blessed by that home. Thomas Carraway; TC as he was nicknamed; friend, brother, Christ follower, many have repeated his name and his well-known quote since Friday. August 31, 2018, a day Tommy knew was coming and was well prepared for, he breathed his last labored breath, and passed into peace. I know a little part of many many hearts went with him. All the wonderful comments and tears among friends and family encircle his memory like a wreath, and like a cushion, makes our pain of loss more bearable. Some lives leave a footprint; some leave a crater.

Sitting near Tommy in worship services, we witnessed his warmth and his completely unpretentious way of letting others know he cared. From his dear friend who never had to sit alone in church after losing her husband, to the hundreds, no, thousands of Guyanese lives touched by Tommy’s love for sharing God’s love, many walk closer to Jesus than we would have without Tommy. My sister and I first began our Guyana missions together, under the leadership of our Tommy. After we returned from the first of those medical missions, Tommy confessed to me that he had predicted I might be “kinda needy” but trusted it to work out. He was happy to say he had been wrong, and encouraged me to keep going back; best of all, he always thanked us for loving the people of Guyana. What a Leader! It has been shared with me that on several onsets of mission trips, knowing his health wasn’t the best, Tommy said that he would be perfectly happy to die right there in Guyana, doing what he loved. Fearless! Tommy put others first – just ask a rookie mission team member – he loaned her his prized Reba t-shirt when her luggage didn’t make it to Guyana with us! Selfless! Little samples of the big love he lived.

So many of us are better people for having known Tommy Carraway, because he wanted us to know Jesus. And what I think he would want us to do now, is to go out and live every day in such a way that those around you can see that you live what you believe – and that is that God and His love are absolutely enough!

I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.” 2 Timothy 4:7 NKJV

Age, You Do Not Scare Me!

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First week of August: It’s hard to be mad at the grass growing in the flower beds when theres a hummingbird sipping on the blue salvia and a bluebird on tbe clothesline pole. Finches are flitting through the blackeyed susans, and a bobwhite calls from the fields. Too much good to dwell on the ungood.
I turn 65 this month, seems like I should be saying that about my parents, not me. But the year of birth verifies it. Its really me. Sitting here on the patio as the sun finds a place to rest, I am overwhelmed with God’s grace. I’ve done nothing to deserve this peace.
Jesus said He gives us peace. Not as the world gives, does He give. And it IS a whole different peace. Though several circumstances could be rewritten if my world were ideal, its that peace that passes all understanding that comes with being in Christ, in spite of the less than idealic. The hummingbird can’t receive life sustenance by being nearby the salvia and feeders, admiring them, talking about them; but must contact that necter, get into it. Well, neither can we receive the peace and grace of Christ”s without contacting Him thru His life giving blood. On the outside looking in just isn’t where He wants us to be. I hear Him beckoning, “Come nearer to me, lean in, feel the peace and protection I promised when you became my child”. Age does not scare me.

THIS DAUGHTER’S DADDY

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I never called my daddy by the more popular ‘dad,’ nor the formal ‘father’. Dad was someone who belonged to my more sophisticated friends; and Father was the one to whom I prayed, the father in Heaven. No, only one name for my daddy – Daddy.

I was born on his 20th birthday, his first child and the apple of his eye I’ve heard, for four and one half years. That’s when his second daughter, a little cherub, was born along with a cradle of other changes in life. But for almost five years, he was all mine, lunch box and all! They say the first few years of a child’s life sets a pattern for giving and accepting love, among other attitudes. After that, we set about real soon trying to abolish every rule, change every ideal, and break every parent’s heart. But for those glorious preschool years, daddies and daughters are pretty tight. In most cases, certainly in mine, all those attempts to become ‘my own’ self of the 1960s and 70s were for nothing. The roots were already down. Deep. In my heart.

Because of my daddy, I still love the smell of wax paper in the lunch box. I happily anticipated his return home after work because I knew I would find a little gem of something left for me in his lunch box.

Because of my daddy, I like the smell of a gasoline engine and oily tools in a garage. I used to line up old spark plugs, nuts and bolts and tools along the wall of the dirt floor garage we first had. A strong pair of hands that held my head up when I was sick often had that grease and oil on them. Thanks for washing them first, Daddy.

Because of my daddy, and my maternal Grandpa, I love the smell of Old Spice aftershave. They both wore it when I was very young, and wrapped my arms around their necks, and sat on Daddy’s knees in church.

Because of my daddy, I love straight young rows of green in the garden. Later, baskets of produce with various colors washed and arranged like flowers in a vase were brought to the door; I love to do that too.

Because of my daddy, I am crazy about breakfast outdoors, and roadside spots to stop and eat bologna and crackers with a coca-cola. He introduced us to camping, too, or I wouldn’t know that this is not always a desirable thing to do. Thanks for the experience Daddy.

There’s nothing magical about wax paper, or motor oil, Old Spice and gardens. The magic that makes these memories mold us is love. Knowing you are safe and surrounded by acceptance is what every child deserves, just for being brought into this world. I had it, and I drip tears onto the newspaper reports of children who get none of it, and worse. Thank you God for a good daddy. Thank you Daddy for loving me, even when I wasn’t lovable.

Happy Father’s Day, to my Daddy, and all the other great dads, grandpas and uncles, and my brother, too! I love you guys!

 

MONDAY MEATLOAF: throw it out if it’s no good.

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It’s Monday, and there are a few things that I’ve assigned to myself every time that rolls around. One is to stay home and serve a home cooked meal after eating out some, if not most (I ashamedly admit) weekend meals. Oh face it girl, we eat out way too often, even during the week. So, Monday, cook. I’ve been through several ways of making meatloaf, trying for years to like what I thought was the way Mama made hers. I threw away the left overs, and didn’t really enjoy it the first time around. But my husband, bless his heart, has always claimed meatloaf is one of his favorites. So, I make a Monday meatloaf. Since I dropped the chopped stuff, I like it much better. The simpler the better, in fact; it’s more dense and tastier with salt, pepper, onion powder, garlic, dried basil, egg, bread and Worcestershire sauce. But until I was willing to throw out the old way with  chopped onions and green peppers, oats and suchlike, I couldn’t get it right – for us anyway.

Another Monday routine is changing the sheets and hanging them out on the line. If it rains on Monday, I’ll wait to wash them as soon as the sun shines. Rick Bragg hit a homer when he wrote, “…cooler than the other side of your pillow” in All Over But the Shoutin. When I read that phrase, it was instant recognition! If you’ve ever slept without air-conditioning, or even with it for that matter, then you know first hand how marvelous it feels to turn that pillow over to the cool side – two breaths later you’re sleeping. The only other requirement I have for a good night’s sleep is that the pillowcase is wearing fragrance that comes only from hanging out with Mother Nature. Simple things.

I try to get a few cards out on Mondays, but that is not consistent since you never know who may need a note of encouragement from one week to the next. It’s always a good Monday if there are no new heartaches nor illnesses among our friends. Actually, if I’m to be honest, there are always a host of lonely folks who would appreciate a card. I’d say the only thing holding me back from routine here, is me.  Dedication. And a supply of cards and stamps. So, it’s hard sometimes to get a routine going, and I am striving for more consistency there. This is not a ‘toss out’.

So what else am I thinking of throwing out with old meatloaf recipes? I may haul off the recycling more often so I can find the garage wall and bags of cans aren’t clanging every time I shut the dining room door. And I’m definitely tossing out this Monday Musings weekly post idea. Yes, I tried it, and I feel it is not achieving my goal. It’s not that the ideas didn’t flow; I have a list of Monday M’s that I haven’t used yet, and I rarely go a week without inspiration from nature or scripture. But the idea of setting a goal to post weekly, (a blogging group’s idea) with a theme (my idea), took the spontaneity, the fun out, in a way. So forgive me ‘Blessed By Blogging’, as I’m sure your suggestions are much better for most folks than my method, but this is not working for me. I guess I write from the heart, and need more time to make it reader friendly. Anyway, speaking strictly for my own writing, I feel weekly makes it too common;  almost tedious for my readers. Although I have had a big jump in followers lately, so comments on this routine are appreciated.

I began my blog for, well, for me. That is contrary to what all the other Christian bloggers say; they aim at writing for the audience of one – God. Don’t get me wrong, please, I truly want to do everything “as unto the Lord”. It’s just that I am always writing in my head and heart, so starting a blog gave me that vehicle to sport around in so to speak. A vehicle to race, or Sunday drive, or park – whatever my pen and paper wanted to do. Mama wanted me to write, believed in me, so the blog is dedicated to her. I also write for someone else, and that’s my sister Kathy. She has been the wind beneath my wings since we were too young to know Bette Midler, or even to know we’d eventually stop fighting and be friends. My goal is to encourage women to see scripture in living color, one blessing after another.

As I said, I get inspiration from nuggets of nature and snippets of life where I see God has tucked in a tidbit of Himself for us to know Him better.  You know, my meatloaf is best when I can’t taste the individual ingredients, but just a great little loaf of compact flavor. Life’s just better blended with God’s gems of scripture to bring out the full flavor. That’s pretty much what my blog has been from the start. I’ve never been too structured. Hey, what farmer’s wife can be? You have to be flexible in our house. In my core, I much prefer schedule, structure, and security. But if I depended on those, I’d be in a wad most of the time. So, I have to be able to throw those out too, from time to frequent time.

So goodbye, Monday Musings. It may be a while, or it may be the next week. I just ain’t- a -gonna wrap myself all up in it. I get a lot of pleasure in my simple meatloaf Mondays with laundry and cards, and no, I don’t think I need a counselor about that….it just feels good to throw out the popular, overworked ideas of what is expected – at least one day a week.

“And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men” Colossians 3:23

Monday Marvel: Hardened Hearts

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Mark 6:52 says the apostles did not understand the miracle of dividing five loaves and two fish among more than five thousand, for ’their heart was hardened’. I keep asking why. Was it because Jesus catered to the crowd? Was it disbelief that Jesus could do what He just did? Again, in Mark 16:14 the eleven are said to be in “unbelief and hardness of heart”. His own! Did they feed off each others’ cynicism? As for our own attitudes toward those in the boat, do we as followers of Jesus empathize, or criticize?

“Be of good cheer! It is I; do not be afraid.” 51 Then He went up into the boat to them, and the wind ceased. And they were greatly amazed in themselves beyond measure, and marveled. 52 For they had not understood about the loaves, because their heart was hardened. (Mark 6:50b-52)

Were the disciples distraught because they’d done his bidding, distributed endless bread and fish, only to be told to go on to Bethsaida, in a boat amid strong winds, without Him? Were they thinking, “Hmph! We are with him daily, doing everything he says, leaving all to follow, and He stays behind with a group of people who didn’t even think far enough to bring their own lunch! Here we are, about to sink and drown! Where is He now?” Could it be a little of that ‘older brother’ syndrome, that the prodigal son met? Likewise, are our hearts hardened toward the help and answers that throngs of people receive, while we sit and wait for answers?

Another question, were their hearts hardened because it was not God’s will yet for them to fully understand His plan for Jesus. Are we humans so predictably weak that God knew the disciples and apostles would desert and depart if they knew the heartache that awaited them at the crucifixion of the Lord; the Lord they would grow to love more each day? There is a very good reason why God doesn’t show us our future! We seem to take the hot water better, a degree at a time. I think maybe both scenarios, lack of humility and lack of understanding of God’s will can be heart hardening agents.

The ‘me-me-me’ mindset of today squeezes out of the picture a true desire for the good of others. I’ve been awfully guilty of it, and hard as it is to look the ugly us in the mirror, you know it’s true of many. Not because we are awful terrible people; but because we are human. And yes, God knows that. Just as He knew Peter, Andrew, James, and John, and all the others who were there. He knew they were tired and had looked forward to that quiet rest Jesus suggested in verse 31. Perhaps they didn’t feel like sharing the end of that day with throngs of needy people. So, too, is my heart hardened when I selfishly think, “enough is enough” or “I’ve dealt with this problem causer enough”, etc. Really? Have I not studied God’s word enough to keep “70 times seven” and “long suffering” foremost in my mind? In some cases, it really is time to turn; but I am speaking to me, for I am an impatient person, which makes for short suffering instead.

If the twelve apostles fully understood the total sacrifice that their leader was about to make; the humility, the service and pain that would be His future, would they have stayed for the long haul? Only God knows. But, they were human.… When the sea is calm, with blue skies and a pleasant breeze, boating may seem like a job I’m all in for. But let the tempest rage, and I may abandon ship, or at least criticize the captain. Are you hearing something real here? The invitation of Jesus to “give you rest” sounds welcome, but if the cost isn’t counted before hand, patience will run thin when there’s work to do. If the answers aren’t what I expected; the results are running amok; if fair weather friends forsake me, do I throw up my hands and quit? “Unbelief and hardness of heart” please leave me.

I am not sure their hearts were ready to accept all that their eyes beheld. My eyes read over and over the accounts of Jesus’ acts, but has my heart encased all the belief I am capable of? “Lord I believe, help my unbelief” (Mark 9:24) may be my motto.

There are different levels of hardened heart throughout scripture, and when I asked, our pulpit minister said that this was likely a simple case of unbelief.  I agree; but I can’t believe it is the same hardened hearts of the Pharisees who were often trying to trip Jesus up with questions like, to heal or not to heal on a Sabbath. What a tremendous miracle the apostles had just witnessed! Yet, in the middle of a wind-blown sea, proving their own efforts futile, their fear and doubt rose above what they’d just seen. BUT – but, when Jesus walked on the water, stepped into the boat, and spoke the waves still, they marveled, and perhaps that hardness of heart in verse 52 was in past tense! When our seas are raging, aren’t we tempted to doubt? It is SO hard to stay focused on what we know about our Lord, and to not think that He must have missed the real answers to our dire straits. Lacking full belief underlies all of the above thoughts on the hardened heart. Faith is how we know OUR very own Jesus is that Jesus who walked on water and stilled the storms. Faith is why we can follow Jesus’ lead in putting others first; fighting the me-me-me mindset. Faith is how we wade through the atrocities of this life knowing the perfect rest awaits. Believing Jesus is our always answer and our excellent example will soften our hearts into a workable faith. Let Him into the boat.  “So then faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.” Romans 10:17

 

MONDAY MEMORIES

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Memorials Are For Remembering    With Memorial Day here, I imagine many of you are just thankful for a day off, or at least extra pay to be at work. Many are hoping for good weather to enjoy the first ‘summer holiday’, and others may be hoping for rain so they can just simply stay in and rest! But whatever you are doing, I hope we are all finding a way and some time to just be remembering. Memorials are for remembering. From rainbows to unleavened bread, God said it is good to remember; and He established several memorials throughout history. Usually we are remembering the bravery and sacrifices of the military on this day, and I am guilty of taking that for granted most of the time. I’ll take the opportunity right here to say a heartfelt THANK YOU to all who gave their time, and often life and limb, for our country. A hundred times thank you!

Remembering Our Heroes  I have enjoyed reading the pieces written lately for our local heroes, though they’d not want it worded that way; Robert Hendon, Billy Murdock, and others. The word ‘hero’ is defined by the heart who spells it. It’s something a little different to each of us. I got to wondering why I know just about nothing of the military experience of my relatives. It is because they don’t like to talk about their service time much, I guess. With the humility they learned from authority, along with the experiences they’d just as soon forget, it’s easy to see why they’d rather have been talking about their first car, or hauling hay. I want to name them here just to pay their service the respect it deserves.

First, my “little brother” Mark Alan Jackson, three years and eight months in the National Guard and ten years in the Marines, during which time he served in Desert Storm. His scars are in his ears and in his heart. I remember he was away at Christmas and made his own fake fireplace out of cardboard to hang a fake stocking. I remember that his first baby was born while he was away, and how exciting it was to watch him walk into the airport the first time he ever laid eyes on her. Thank you Mark.

Several of my favorite uncles were military men. Uncle Wade was married to my Momma’s only sister and treated us just like his own family.  Alvin Wade Holley served in the army during WWII as a mechanic. He wore an injured eye the rest of his life because a starter fell off into his eye while servicing one of the army trucks. I don’t remember any of his stories if there were any; I do remember he had the biggest heart in all the world for anyone who needed anything ever! I miss you, and thank you Uncle Wade.

Uncle Jerry Fuqua served in the army in the Korean War, married my daddy’s late sister, and lives in Paris, Tennessee. Now, as I said, they didn’t talk about themselves much so I didn’t hear this first hand from him, but Lil Brother says there’s this one incident he has heard about from Uncle Jerry’s combat time. I won’t be too specific, but it involves the necessary bodily function that still had to be carried out even if a tree or a ditch was the only outhouse available. It also involved a Korean sniper, on a hill with a good view of Uncle Jerry taking care of business so to speak. Now the story goes that when the shot went right between Uncle Jerry’s knees, nearly scaring him out of a year’s growth, the sniper just grinned and waved. I’ll be interested in finding out how much of that was truth. But at nearly 10PM, I’m not bothering a sweetheart like him just to get a good story straightened out. More on that later, perhaps. What I remember most of Uncle Jerry, is that he takes EVERYTHING in stride, cool as a cucumber, and loved my Aunt Sue truly big. Thank you Uncle Jerry.

Henry Veltman Jackson, my great-uncle, served in the Navy and experienced Pearl Harbor up close and personal. The story goes that he saved a piece of a Japanese pilot’s scarf when the pilot crashed into their ship. That was a little too close, I’d say. Uncle Veltman’s son, Johnnie Veltman Jackson also served in the Navy. They are both gone now, and what I know about their duties is nothing, I hate to say. What I remember is that they both made the first five years of my life a joy. Uncle Veltman and Aunt Lorene were like parents to my parents when they were newly weds in a big city far from home. And Johnnie was a big brother to me. They loved me like I was their own. Many others have spoken of how richly that family layered the love onto their lives, too. Thank you Uncle Veltman, and thank you Johnnie.

Hero is a Subjective Word   Last but not least, MY GRANDPA! William Chesterfield Wilkins, Chess to most folks, Chesley to my Grandma, Daddy to my Momma. Grandpa was inducted into the army near the end of WWI, when there was  an outbreak of pneumonia. Grandpa was sent home to recover from the pneumonia and the war ended before he had a chance to return. So, his status of ‘hero’ to me, all took shape at home. I remember that Grandpa could do chin ups from a maple tree limb when he was in his 60’s, maybe near 70; and that we planted a garden together in his back yard – in town. He cared a whole whoppin’ lot about his grandkids, and that we learned the important things. He chose the direct, quick and effective application of discipline; which is why he gave me my hardest whipping ever when I was about ten. I watched my little brother pretty closely after that, for a while anyway. Grandpa was a diabetic and at that time, the only snacks he could have were bananas and Fresca. I remember that when we went to his house, he would give us his last banana if we asked for it; no, he just gave it without waiting for us to ask; and a glass of Fresca too. He didn’t have an easy life, but he made life easy for his family in every way he could. Thank you Grandpa.

Remembering the lives of our personal heroes is a way of keeping them near if their hearts lie still. It tells those who remain with us that they matter, and that they always will.

I would be an ungrateful Christian if I didn’t mention my biggest hero. A memorial I am privileged to take part in every Sunday is to remember the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. He gave His entire existence to saving, healing, feeding, and teaching the masses – the entire world if they will accept Him. From the beginning of time as His blood flowed backward, to the end of time as His blood flows forward from the cross, He stands lovingly, tenderly pleading, “Come unto me.” Thank you God.

“Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” ( Matthew 11:28 NKJV)

 

 

 

 

Monday Musings: Mountaintops

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Here it is Monday again, and as I savor my second cup of Maxwell House, I realize I’ve enjoyed my new book by Rick Bragg a little too long and haven’t made my Monday post. This week I share my view from a friend’s mountaintop. This was written last year to express my joy for them, and now seems the right time, with it being Mother’s Day month, to share it.

YOU CAN’T GIVE WHAT YOU DON’T OWN

A Lesson From Someone Else’s Mountaintop

When people reach their mountaintops, they raise their arms, fist bump the sky and shout with incredible joy. Sometimes, their journey is a lesson they themselves may not realize they wrote. One such mountaintop lesson that spoke to me recently is the completion of a long awaited adoption process. Not of my own, but that of a friend.

My daughter’s best friend and her husband adopted a daughter from China. You can read of her family’s incredible journey in her blog, The Glass Slipper at crouchcrew.com. In her beautiful account of their experience as adoptive parents and siblings, she talks about the anguish she imagines the birth mother having as she must wonder about her baby girl’s destiny. Never having been in that situation myself, I too can only imagine the emotional war that must take place within a birth mother’s heart when she makes the selfless choice to give her child what she hopes is a better life. I would say that in our world today this is a decision that almost never is made by anyone other than that mother herself. It got me to thinking of giving and how you can’t give what you don’t have. It is her decision to give. To give a child another life; and to give another family the privilege of calling her baby theirs, is the ultimate gift. That is, other than the gift of God’s own son to us, to make a way for us to have eternal hope, eternal life, eternal joy. This is a gift we could never deserve, and has been given because it is His to give first of all, and secondly because He has that much love for us, His adopted children.

Accepting the wonderful gift that the Father God has given involves another matter of giving. We have to give; give up something first. If our hands are full of self, sin, sorrow…whatever we are holding, then they cannot open to take His gift. These things must first be given up, but what you don’t own, you can’t give. So, we must own our sins. We must own our sorrows and regrets. By pointing fingers of fault at others we are refusing to own, or accept responsibility for our wrongs. Excuses, reasons, or holding onto grudges and envying will not get rid of the wrongs. Until we own our sins, both committed by us and to us, we cannot give them away-

– away, at the foot of the cross;
– away, into the hands of God;
– away, in forgiveness for self and others.

We must stop making them the fault of anyone or anything else. Own them – and give them up. We’ve always heard ‘confession is good for the soul,’ and I think this is why. Though it’s HARD to do, it’s SO worth it. Putting it all down at Jesus’ feet, emptying ourselves of all that stands in our way of grasping His great gifts, is the giving that makes a new life possible. Peter put it this way, “humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.” (I Peter 5:6-7) Then we are able to give His unending love away over and over to others because it is the true gift that keeps on giving. The more you have, the more you can give.

Kim and Steven emptied something out of themselves to make room in their life for a little girl who was in need of a family. Not a small sacrifice. Nor was it for the mother who gave her baby to become the new joy of another family. Theirs is one example of this marvelous circle of giving that God started centuries ago. The more we give up (ultimately ourselves), the more room we have to accept and the more He gives. God doesn’t push Himself on anyone. He stands waiting, wanting us to share His love, to lead others to Him where He is with arms full to load us up with more love, grace, and mercy. To quote a beautiful spiritual hymn, “I am mine no more”. When we empty ourselves and put on Christ, we fill up with the Spirit, and then bless others by sharing what we now own – the love of God.

“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.” John 13:34-35 (NKJV)

“Love one another, for love is of God; he who loves is born of God and knows God.” I John 4:7